From our fcf vacation. Got home early today, but then went to see ted and do dinner and grabbed some cheap dressy shorts from kohls. I have pictures on Mirabella i need to go through. I went through tumblr on my phone, so i need to scan my likes and see which are bookmarks. I meant to go to bed 3 hours ago. I put on 2 pounds while i was out hiking, swimming, paddle boating, canoeing and scaring deer. Wtf. I havent hooped since i got back, too tired. Tomorrow is going to be serious catch up.
I started going to the dojo when I was in sixth grade. It was a very masculine environment; there weren’t a lot of other girls there but the male senseis who ran the place were great guys and they genuinely loved having female students because we were such a rarity.
Now back in sixth grade I was tinier even than what I am now, and now I’m only 5’2. Then I was probably even under 5’0. I mean I was a squirt of a kid. But I loved to fight; I loved to be in the ring, I loved the adrenaline rush and I loved having punches hurled at me. It was fun for me. Our dojo did full-contact sparring, which was pretty brutal. These were the only rules:
you must wear a mouth guard and gloves
no hits below the belt
That’s pretty much it.
Anyway every Thursday was Fight Night, where all we did was spar each other. And on my First Night Sensei Diven—who has since passed, bless his soul—paired me up with this really cocky and assholish brown belt to show me the ropes a little. This brown belt kid was bigger than me by a lot; he must have been at least six feet and twice my weight. But man was I excited to get into the ring! I had a fight boiling in my blood.
Now, Sensei Diven was not a stupid man and he hated high-ranking kids that showed a bad attitude. This kid had a bad attitude. So he must have seen the evil gleam in my eye from a mile away and decided it was time for a little improvisation.
Anyway, Sensei yelled, “Start!” and I leapt into fight stance and the other kid didn’t even put his hands up. He was laughing at me, sneering, the whole nine yards. “I’ll give you a free one.” he joked, and he slapped his side. “You barely weigh 100 pounds and you’re a girl. So go ahead, little girl. Hit me.”
And I hit him. I cocked my leg up as high as it would go and roundhouse kicked him right in the ribs with all of my might and all of the contempt I felt for his stupid cocky face which was covered in ugly-ass freckles and his nasty-ass braces. And I heard a crack. Like a real snap! sound. And the kid has a look of surprise on his face like it was nobody’s business, and then he goes right to the floor like a sack of potatoes.
Now, Sensei Diven leisurely strolls over from the group of black belts who are laughing their asses off at me, the tiny little white belt, sending my Goliath to the floor. I mean they’re laughing so hard they look like they’re about to pee themselves. They think it’s a game. And in his great booming voice he hollers:
“Brown Belt! Why are you on the floor? Do you not see this white belt has been assigned to fight you?”
And meanwhile he is just crying. I broke one of his ribs.
And Sensei Diven just squats down next to this poor kid and whispers, “Don’t you know that women are made of pain?”
*HUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGS* UGH I am so sorry you had a night terror! I know I personally felt off for days(comforting I know) @_@ I wish I knew how to stop our nightmares because they seem endless and nothing I do seems to stop them completely. *hugs more* I hope that this never happens to you again ;_; and I hope that nightmare dies in a fire never to return
I was super afraid to go to sleep last night, and made Husband leave a cat with me and the door open. I spent a couple of hours waking up everytime I started to dream, then the allergy attack kicked in and I had to take a benadryl, and I slept through the night. I wasn’t back on track to completely control my dreams, but I was able to do some casual shifting and reworking, so no terrors, thank the cosmos. Husband explained that he thought I was either suffocating or turning into a zombie, lol. I’ve been keeping super busy so as not to think about it, but I still can’t talk about the contents of the terror, so I know I’m not over the hurdle yet.
-shudders- I can’t imagine having more than one of those incidents. And I’m terrified to take sleep meds for fear that they’ll make it where I can’t wake up.
When I said “I know that feel” about nightmares, I was mistaken and I retract that statement.
Having woken up screaming with my mouth shut, giving Husband the scare of his life and then spending the entire day shaking scared, I now know that nightmares can always been ten times worse than I expected.
So, let’s hope I now know the feel, because if it gets worse, that would suck hardcore.